So, The Gloss gave us few tips on running our career like a gentlewoman:
1. A gentlewoman is generous, but not in a pathetic way
Instead of:
"Oh, you have the last dinner roll! No, really, you must. I know it’s my birthday, but deep inside I feel both superior and martyred when I make small, pointless sacrifices for others!"
You should:
Kind and generous to anyone who isn’t a threat or a serious competitor. A pep talk, interested question, or moment of mentoring in an elevator doesn’t cost you anything. If you have maternal instincts, you can use them in business. Plenty of men came up in their careers because someone treated them “like a son.”
Instead of:
Wait for other people to pay for things, and halfheartedly open her purse and then look confused, waiting for someone else to jump in.
You Should:
Say something in a normal voice. For instance, “Should we split this one?”, or “Here’s forty, that should do it.” Please don’t embarrass all women with equivocal little-girl money bullshit.
For Example:
Back to careers: It’s hard to imagine a “ladylike” person effectively negotiating for a raise.
Here’s something interesting: The writers negotiated an agreement with a company she worked for, and felt that she had been firm and assertive, and had done a good job in the meeting. Nearly a year later, the same boss referred back to that meeting and said he was glad she’d been so “collegial” and “not adversarial.”
Instead of:
initiate anything with anyone who depends on you for money (and don’t interpret the deference and alacrity of an employee for attraction or even friendship).
You should:
With great power comes great responsibility! A teen-sized t-shirt that says “I beat up boys” is just sad. But it’s a totem of a larger problem of people who mistake feminism as meaning that anything a woman has the power to do must be, by power of semantics, empowering.
You can read full article here.
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