Sometimes saya menginginkan hidup yang spontan, tapi terkungkung akan ketakutan gagal, dan kekecewaan. Semua penuh strategi, bahkan untuk urusan hati. As you know, brain is not a good friend of heart. Dan dua organ tadi kadang membuat skenario saya hanya terlihat seperti bungkus gorengan.
Di umur twenty-something, saya merasa brain is the biggest enemy of my heart. Saat meniti karir dan melihat masa depan menjanjikan, sekonyong-konyong hatimu berubah menjadi otak. Dan ketika otakmu sudah memberi perintah akan sesuatu hal yang bisa diterangkan dengan logika, then u'll be a heartless bitch. Cold-blooded heartless bitch.
Saat ini, i'm in Simon Cowell shoes. Especially when Ryan once said : "He doesn't have an organ that we're all have". I let my brain do what's best for me, i'm not listen to my heart, i'm not ready for it. I'm not ready for a heart, and all compensations of utilize it.
You know what, i miss my heart badly. I rather be a shallow cheesy 'dumb blonde', and have a heart. But i can't, i'm Miss Twenty Something, and Miss Twenty Something need a brain to survive.
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